One step at a time when there is massive hurt in a relationship. We both have individual therapy sessions set up to start dealing with the issues at hand. Stephen starts next week and I’m the first week of August.

It was an interesting experience telling the triage therapist that I need someone who is really comfortable talking about BDSM and kink with part of my/our goal is to return to our DD/bg dynamic full of kinky sex. She seemed a little surprised at my candor. lol Well… it’s part of life. It will do little good to talk to someone who is really uncomfortable, or worse, kink shames.

For the moment, we’re working at keeping things light. Brunch at our favorite spot yesterday. A couple returns that’ve been sitting a while. A nice long nap. Cooking dinner together. Focusing on the parts of us that make the marriage which work seemlessly.

I’m making a concerted effort not to try and control his actions. Do I want to change the wi-fi password or put parental controls on it? Of course I do!!! He’s not a child. He’s battling addiction. I’ve made the commitment to myself and him not to keep pouring over the really hurtful shit he was posting. It just adds to the trauma and stress…. and the likelihood that I’m going to scream at him and cry again. None of that is helpful.

As for today, well, I’m starting off with a little blogging, catching up on my games and I’m headed out to have coffee with my bestie soon. A nap is order again today, too. Forgot to silence the phones last night and it made some Hellascious noise at 4am. Been up since.

Time to shower and primp. Hope your day is peaceful…. maybe even kinky.